Rant alert

A Rant from the perspective of a road cyclist trying to train in a fitness center spin class taught by non-cyclists...

I've been spinning in the gym since October and every night I spin (in class) I have to; grit my teeth, roll my eyes, shake my head, make bad faces and eventually curse into my sodden sweat towel, at the inane bullshit pushed by the "spin instructors." Ok, they are very pleasant women, but for flaming-fuck's-sake, they aint cyclists.

So, I will direct my comments to you the surrogate instructors.

First, start each class with a proper warm up and cool down. A warm up does not consist of 2 minutes of pedal-flailing followed by some upper body stretching. News Flash. It's a spin session. We're about to use our legs, back and cardio-pulmonary system. Upper bodies should be relaxed and quiet. Are you taking notes?

You might consider opening with a statement of the workout's structure, content and purpose. Think long and hard on this.

Let's talk about nomenclature for second. Use of an arbitrary 1 to 10 scale for perceived resistance is useless as is a notion of a "percentage of your max" to describe cadence. Cadence is a precise measurement of pedal revolutions. Learn to count and multiply. Teach this, it's important. Honest. While we're on the subject of cadence, we don't need to spend too much time below 60 rpms. Don't know why? Maybe you should do some reading. Before we move on, take a look around the room. Notice the guys whose knees are flaring out like he's riding a clown bike and the other guy whose upper body movements look like Stevie Wonder at the keyboard? Yeah, those are problems and you need to go help them out.

Now, I've noticed that every work set is based on the notion that we're going to climb a hill and we're going to recover "on the flats" and for some reason we're going to add a ton of resistance until cadence drops into the basement and get out of the saddle as often as possible.

So, if you would go out for a road ride on a two-wheeled bicycle you'd be pleased to find that some flat roads hurt like hell and some climbs are almost pleasant if you "spin" a comfortable gear. Bear in mind, you can climb like this and still get a dynamite workout and you'll find you have plenty more matches to burn later in the ride. Notice that "S" word I just used? Sounds amazingly like what these classes are supposed to include.

This last point may seem trivial or perhaps petty, but this is my blog so, too bad. You seem to like to give out long motivational whoops, like "Wow! We are having some bitchin' fun here now!" I've got news for you. If you have enough wind to whoop like that, you're not working hard enough.

In summation people, spin the cranks like you're a damn sewing machine. Learn what 90 rpms feels like. Add enough resistance so you suck wind. If you can speak more than your name, add more. Hold that effort until its time to cool down. Use out-of-the-saddle work to break the monotony, it doesn't help the workout.

Now maybe I can sleep.

You hear many fitness experts go on about the importance of rest and recovery. I know this well, but seldom apply this like I ought to. In my last post I mentioned how much I was looking forward to Sunday's yoga class...

Heh. As soon as my eyes opened yesterday I knew the likelihood of actually getting there was pretty low. Basically, I wanted to get the grocery shopping trip out of the way, get some breakfast and take a nap. Mission accomplished, yikes. And holy crap was my appetite fired up. Call me Galactus. Google it if you're not a Marvel fan.

I was a bit concerned about today's work out given the quantity of hummus I ate yesterday, but thankfully things quieted down before getting on the spin bike. For the second week in a row, some skinny wench beat me to my favorite bike. I'll have to try and get there by 4:45. Rode from around 5:10 until 6:00 and pushed pretty hard.

K'Bell class was a blast as usual. Warm up was alternating ball slams (15) and air squats. If you've never done ball slams, you're missing out on a real treat. As a cyclist, the term sounds like and unfriendly union of crotch and top tube, but in reality the pain is all (well, mostly) upper body.

Started off the real fun with 5 rounds of 2H swings alternating with kb burpees. Used 55# bells for this.

Then we did more snatching. 10R/10L, but alternating L/R every rep, which was nice. In between we did swings, 20 to 50 in jumps of 10. Used a 35# bell.

Finished up with tabata rounds (8) of goblet squats. Stuck with a 35# bell.

Found out another kettlebeller (Mark) is a new roadie. Between he and Josh, maybe I'll be able to recruit some new training partners.

Be gone Winter!

Dear Winter, It's been a lot of fun now enough is enough. You don't have to go home but you can't stay here.

Call me a wuss but I just can't get excited about riding when it's below 50 degrees. So although the sun was out today I still am riding indoors.

I did a few sets of dips, push ups, standing military presses, curls and sit ups. I was a little bummed with my overhead lifts. I only got one rep @135 and the bar was slow going up.

Next I got on the spin bike for 70 minutes. I did 2 intervals of out-of-the saddle spinning @~70-75rpm, 1 for 3 minutes, 1 for 5 minutes and it felt pretty good. Jim joined me for the last 25 minutes but wanted to do a bit more, so while he used the elliptical I tried out the rower. That felt pretty damn good. Did 4km in 20 minutes.

Looking forward to yoga class tomorrow.

Holy Crap, that hurts.

Monday's kettlebell class was fairly taxing and I decided not to do any additional work after yoga class. Tuesday's class was really good, but not terribly taxing.

BodyPump went well on Wednesday and while certain things are always very challenging, at the end I didn't feel as wrung out as I was in the beginning. I have to remember to bring something to take notes on the weights I'm using. The new bicep track is really hard and I was really sweating through it. I seem to think I used 22kg on the bar (10kg+1kg plates), but I'm not sure and there's no way I could have handled more. The lunge track is always a disaster so I guess I should do more of those.

Hell's Bells.

Managed a good 15 minutes of spinning before kb class. We did warm ups outside. The program for the men was swing/run/squat. I only ran once (2 laps) and on the 2 repeats I stuck with jumping jacks. Swings were 25/25/10 with a 53# bell.

Another long snatch workout tonight and I made it harder than it had to be. Was supposed to do 10 to 1 ladders of L/R snatches with double overhead hold while the partner snatched. I didn't catch the ladder part, so I just did sets of 10 until discovered my ignorance, about 8 rungs later.

Finished up with alternating swings and front squats; 25 swings/set, 2 sets russian, 2 american (only). Then off to spin class.

This has been going something like this; I need maybe 10 minutes of easy spinning to recover from kb class then I can ratchet up the effort. By the time I'm working really hard I'm ready to punch the leader for whooping and not knowing how to structure intervals and doing other stupid shit.

Since I moved the saddle back a bit, my left knee has been feeling better. Can't wait for this cold weather to GTF out so I can ride outdoors.

I took last Friday off because I was dog tired.

Saturday I started off with some dips, push ups, curls and standing military presses. Did 60 minutes on the spin bike with a few intervals.

Sunday I just did the 1030 yoga class.

Today:
45 minutes on the bike and pushed pretty hard.
Kettlebell class warm up was 2 sets of 25 swings w/ 35/44/53 # bells. 15 second rest between sets.

The big workout was 5R/5L snatches w/ 2 arm swing, starting at 4. Ladder went up and down to 20 swings by 2.
5R/5L, 4 swings;
5R/5L, 6 swings;
etc.

Finished w/ 2 farmer's walks, alternating with (1) goblet squats w/ 35# and (2) high planks. Used 70# bells for the 1st one, 53# for the 2nd.

Tuesday: Good yoga class.

Wednesday: Good bodypump class.

Thursday: 15 minute spin before kb class.

Hell's Bells:
Went outside for a bit. Told Viv I was staying away from running for a while. Warm up was alternating jumping jacks and air squats instead of the run + farmer's walk around the parking lot w/ 53# bells. Oh yeah, I got to wear a 30lb weight vest for this.

Next we did 2 rounds of 2 arm swings and 2 rounds of goblet squats, 60 seconds on, 30 seconds off. Used a 53# for the swings and a 45# for the squats.

Next we did 10 to 1 ladders of R/L clean/squat/2 hand swing. I did this with a 45# bell.

Finally, we went back inside to do snatches. Worked with a partner on this one and used 35# bells for this. 1 half did 10 to 1 ladders of L/R snatches, the other half held 2 bells overhead for the duration. Lost traction on my bell twice, almost took out Ryan the second time. Way to be alert and keep happy feet Dude!

Finally

Last Friday: Lots of upper body work. Standing military press, dips, pushups, tricep extensions and curls, followed by 45 minutes on the spin bike.

Saturday: Some follow-up upper body work, pullups, more curls, pushups. Then squats. Brought in the cambered bar (thanks JR). Some warm up sets then 10 x 155, 2 x 8 x 245, ? x 315. Legs felt good, even the left side. The ligaments on the inside and outside have felt a bit sore now and then. Not sure what sets it off.

Sunday: Rest.

Monday: 40 minute spin as a warm up to kb class.

Hell's Bells.
Warm up: Was supposed to be a run/farmer's walk outside around the parking lot. I skipped the run and went right to the FW, 2 laps w/ 53#.

2 x 5 kb burpees.

Tabata rounds:

8 x 2 arm swings w/ 53#.
4 russian twisters/4 bell juggle w/ 35#
8 thrusters, 4L/4R w/ 35#
8 reverse lunge, 4L/4R w/ 35#

5.5 minutes (mostly) non-stop russian/american swings

I've been following the reports coming out of Japan following the earthquake and tsunami. Horrible. Threat of multiple core meltdown events at Fukushima Daiichi.

Pretty busy week so far. Tuesday's yoga class was really good and I worked up a great sweat. I didn't have any extra time so I went home right after class.

Wednesday I dragged myself out of bed early and made it to BodyPump. I'm really happy with how I'm progressing with the shoulder, tricep and ab tracks, but I'm still really weak on lunges.

Tonight I felt really tired before heading to the gym. Spent an easy 20 minutes on a bike before kettlebells. Viv took the night off and Jason ran the show.

Warm up was 30-20-10-20-30 swings and air squats with 1 minute rest.

Reviewed the press, worked 1 to 5 to 1 L/R clean and press.

Held double bells racked and worked double press.

Did 21 rounds (tabata) of 4 snatch, 3 rack, 2 thruster L/R IN 20 seconds 10 second rest.

4 rounds of 10 goblet squat, 10 burpee, 10 squat-jumps. This sucked. A lot.

Some stretching.

Last 45 minutes of spin class.

55 minute warm up on the spin bike. Had to wait a few minutes for the on ramp group to finish up.

4 sets of 1 minute swings, 2 with a 35# bell and 2 with a 53#.

10 - 1 ladder of swing movements against the wall, w/ no bell, w/ bell against the chest.

5 x 5 kb burpees and farmers walk. 1st 2 w/ 53# bells, last 3 with 35# bells.

Ouch.

Tuesday night I warmed up for yoga with a short spin. Had a very good session with a lot of heat. Finished that off with some assisted pullups and lat pulldowns.

I skipped Wednesday morning BodyPump to take Sanzo to the vet.

Only had time for about 5 minutes on the bike before the kb class.

Kb class was plenty challenging.

2 handed swings, 5 sets of 30 swings with a 30 sec rest.

2 x 5 kb burpees + farmer's walk/overhead hold.

8 sets x 20 sec goblet squats then 10 seconds of rest.

8 sets (4 R/4 L) 20 sec. thrusters then 10 sec rest.

5 x 1 min. american/russian swings, 1 min rest.

Tough workout but I didn't feel horrible. The last 2 sets of swings were rough on the forearms.

Finished the night off with the last 45 minutes of spin class.